i was wandering about the internet, when it occurred to me just how much vitriol it vomits in my direction. so i felt compelled to spew my feelings in return.

dear internet (and especially tumblr,)

sometimes i really hate you.

i’m not sure if it’s because i’m not a teenager anymore, or because i don’t see the point in getting all fired up unless i plan on taking action to back up my words, but i’ve just about had it with the community of younger people who, for whatever reason, have decided that compromise is no longer on the table as a solution for dealing with problems of any kind. they claim loud and repetitiously that the world is grey, but argue in black and white. this is not only tragically ineffective, but also contradictory to what they want to put across: don’t say one thing and do another. hypocrisy isn't a good look on anyone.

do not misunderstand me, internet. i’m not belittling anyone’s circumstances, i’m not trying to invalidate anyone’s feelings or experiences. i'm not trying to actively yell at all of the young'ns to get off my lawn or threatening them with my digital cane. it’s just that being hyper-aggressive in your opinions (about a cause or incident) is one of the worst ways to argue for whatever it is you’re defending. being grossly assertive and cruel invites backlash and apathy, especially if you are a member of a community that has been nothing but aggressive towards those who don't understand, but would like to.

i had a friend once, who aggressively and vulgarly cut down everything i said in regards to my experiences with anything and everything. i daresay they took pleasure in telling me that everything i believed was wrong, despite the fact that what i believed was based on my personal experiences, and research, in some cases. for a long time, the two of us had a semi-antagonistic relationship, but i was determined not to let our differences in opinion get the better of our friendship, because i enjoyed debating with them, watching movies with them, lazing about and drinking and making out with them.

but then they told me that there was no way i was queer, because i presented as a woman and was dating a man, at the time. it hurt my feelings, to think that this person i’d associated with, was friends with, went out of my way to spend time with, was pushing their judgement on me regarding my personal identity and sexual preferences. it hurt.

this is how i feel about you, internet.

sometimes you’re brilliant - you make excellent commentary, encourage people to question their ingrained biases, you open people to the possibility of knowledge and even encourage learning! you show people that they have the capacity to make their lives better, help them cope with circumstances beyond their own control.

but then you ruin it, by telling people that their feelings and experiences are not valid, that they are worth less than other people for being trans or cis or white or asian or black or christian or atheist or any number of the variable traits which make up a person. you tell people that the public school system is worth nothing, you tell them that being “socially awkward” is a cute trait, you encourage people to be cruel to themselves and others for no discernible reason or worse, a reason that is baseless and undoubtedly backed by hatred. you encourage misogyny, you encourage hate, selfish egotism; for every amazing article where social progress is being made, there are five more telling me about a site that is mocking a disabled girl, about a meme parodying the special olympics, about how unnatural biracial relationships and children are – don't think i've forgotten all that horrific awfulness about that cheerios commercial - and i just don’t understand why that is.

i try to live my life in a way that doesn’t cause harm to anyone else. if nothing else, i try to follow the golden rule, that is, treat others as you would like to be treated. do unto others as you would have them do unto you. i’m not a christian, but even if jesus was just a schizophrenic with really good ideas, that is the best among them.

be kind to one another. be courteous, treat others with love and affection. there is no need to be cruel, there is no need to bite and claw and tear a person down for any reason and especially no reason at all.

you are free to dislike whom you will. you are free to disagree, to debate, to make slide presentations and write essays and explain why you feel the way you do and why you would like others to feel that way. you are also free to care about what you want.

as we fight for equal rights for everyone, as we fight for equality between all people, socially and economically and culturally, we must learn to get along with our differences, to respect and revere them. we must be kind, we must show love, tolerance and patience.

my wish this year is that people take the golden rule to heart, and act on it.

to quote a certain pair of time travelers,